Monthly Archives: October 2013

Three is a Charm

Laughing during our Rose Ceremony

Sadly, I’m away at a work conference this week, so since I’m not around to deliver an anniversary card to my husband, I figured him being the internet loving fool that he is might appreciate a blard (blog card) – yup I just made that up.

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Three years ago, I cried happy tears down an aisle toward my fiance. We were getting married!

The older we get, the faster time seems to fly. Maybe it’s because we have so much going on in our lives as we get older, there just isn’t as much downtime as there used to be. It seems like it was just yesterday when I was standing on the church balcony steps with my bridesmaids and my little nieces and nephew waiting for the service to begin. I remember waiting with my dad for the music to start playing to signal us to walk down the aisle, and it took forever. For longer than an awkward minute – we waited and I wondered if I was going to have to walk down the aisle with no music playing and it seemed like the worst thing ever at the time. Finally the music started and off we went.

Three years ago, I officially promised to love and honor my husband for always. I don’t remember all the words that were exchanged, but I do remember my husband jumping the gun when the minister was about to ask the “I do” question and everyone laughed. It felt beautiful to be loved by someone you loved back.

Years before I met RJ, I remember being at this holiday party at my old place of work and a co-worker introduced me to his significant other for the first time. He was SO excited. I remember him specifically saying, “This is MY (insert her name).” And that moment has always stuck with me. It hit me then and there that I needed to be with someone who felt that way about me. Not just someone who was okay with you being around, but someone who got excited about the prospect of you being there. Someone who couldn’t wait to introduce you to their friends. It was about that time in my life where I knew the relationship I was in wasn’t good for me…and seeing someone elses healthy relationship helped me re-evaluate what I wanted.

RJ & I at a friends wedding

It would be a few years before RJ and I found each other – but as soon as we met, I knew the way he treated me was different in a good way and that I was onto something good. A good friend of mine once told me we should all be with someone who adores us, and that I should never settle for anything less. At the time, I thought she was crazy because I wasn’t in a situation where I felt like that and it seemed so impossible and out of reach. Three years later, a lot of life has happened but I know that RJ adores me. He doesn’t have to say it, it’s the way he treats me. He doesn’t need to bring me flowers every day – but he brings them often enough that they are a pleasant surprise. It’s the way he remembers exactly what kind of beer I like (and don’t like) because I can never keep it straight. My constant question: “Will I like that one?” and he is usually right. He knows me.

It’s the way he works his butt off to provide for our family, and how much he stresses out about us being “happy” when he really doesn’t need to. We are already happy, but it’s nice to have someone work so hard for you even when you don’t ask them to.

It’s the way that he knows when I’m upset, the best way to talk to me is not in person, but via Google Chat, because he knows I’m way better at explaining myself and opening up if I can write it out instead. And he let’s me do that, even if it’s not his preference. He lets me be me, even if it’s totally lame about how I need to communicate sometimes.

It’s also the way that every meal we have is sort of like eating at a restaurant (except healthier and cheaper) because I grew up eating out all the time and this was his way of helping me learn how to eat at home. Even if we are just eating dinner on a Tuesday downstairs in front of the TV, he still focuses on professional presentation on the plate, even when I forget to say anything about it. He goes out of his way to make me feel special.

This last year has been the most challenging as we added a new person to our family, but if anything, it’s given me more reasons to feel good about marrying this man. Seeing RJ be a father has been both magical and frightening! haha Frightening only because he had never held a baby until Daxton was literally handed to him in the operating room at the hospital despite RJ’s protests and seemingly valid excuse, “But, I’ve never held a baby before!” to which our doctor said “Well, now’s the time, son!”

But it’s been mostly magical watching this guy who has a hard time leaving a party, who always (ALWAYS) talks too loudly, and who still acts mostly like a kid when a bike is involved fall completely & totally in love with our son. I am so glad to say that my husband is ALSO a wonderful father. The way that he loves our son makes me love him even more.

In our third year of marriage, we are a family of three. And while I know the years ahead will be full of good and hard times as we figure out this parenting stuff and as we continue to “grow up” – I know I’ve got just the right guy to get me though it.

To MY RJ – Happy Anniversary (I adore you, too).

Our family picture on Mother’s Day

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